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Jan. 31st, 2010


(no subject)

(italics indicate those which I think apply to me)

SEPTEMBER: Suave and compromising. Careful, cautious and organized. Likes to point out people's mistakes. Likes to criticize. Stubborn. Quiet but able to talk well. Calm and cool. Kind and sympathetic. Concerned and detailed. Loyal but not always honest. Does work well. Very confident. Sensitive. Good memory. Clever and knowledgeable. Loves to look for information. Must control oneself when criticizing. Able to motivate oneself. Understanding. Fun to be around.(I hope:) Secretive. Loves leisure and traveling. Hardly shows emotions. Tends to bottle up feelings. Very choosy, especially in relationships. Systematic.

hmmm. very interesting.

Nov. 20th, 2009


tgif? oh yes. yes, yes, yes.

Hello today, please be boring.
warning: looonnnng epic-novel proportions post aheadCollapse )

I felt like Arthur on the Magic School Bus: "I should've stayed home today."

Oct. 28th, 2009


Writer's Block: Nature or nurture

Do you think your moods are controlled by your brain chemistry or that your brain chemistry dictates your moods? Do you believe people are born with particular emotional temperaments or that they are primarily shaped by environmental factors?

my answer?


Sep. 4th, 2009


details and photos still to come

I'm engaged!

Jun. 30th, 2009


love is the movement.

I had dinner with lindsay tonight. Twas lovely and tasty (I am in love with Ramsi's now) and only a bit awkward (heh). it was nice to see a friend at last. i have such antisocial tendencies...but I told her some about the last few months, and never finished telling, but instead ended up writing it now, because I think I need to talk about it, yeah?
Anyway, it's a sort-of-poem, and I apologize for the length. It's the description of the first panic attack I had, the one with no apparent cause, and the way that Cory took care of me and, albeit unwittingly, kept me from hurting him or myself.

she is lovedCollapse )

Love always


Apr. 22nd, 2009



I had a dream, two days ago, I think.
I was in a church, and I didn't feel claustrophobic.
The message was about compassion and about love, not about a set of rules. It was about loving your neighbor as yourself, and in my dream, I knew that everyone in the room was learning to do just that. Every face was different. People of different races sat with their families, happy to be together, and happy to sit next to someone not exactly like themselves. The wealthy suburbanites sat next to the homeless. Everyone was united together because everyone was broken, and they all needed to be helped back on their feet. Everyone had a secret sadness, no matter how they appeared.
They all knew a secret.
They knew that sadness and pain can be anywhere, but joy can be the same way.
Coming together shared their joy, and no matter how little there was to start with, it was always enough to spread around to everyone.
Rich, poor, black, brown, white, gay, straight, old, young, cool, nerdy, and any other classifications of people were there, and they did not hold any of these characteristics against each other. Instead, they were all friends, all loved each other, and simply cared about how to care for each other.

I woke up sad.

I have never seen this, and I wonder if it can even exist, because nobody seems able to love unconditionally.

Then I heard our chapel speaker today.
This was his dream, and this is his church. It's small, but it's growing, because instead of meeting in one big building, they meet wherever people are, and build friendships with each other, and help each other, no matter what they believe.

Maybe it can be more than a mere dream.

Jan. 20th, 2009


(no subject)

Snow is falling outside, big, fat, soft, white flakes, and Yo-Yo Ma, Itzhak Perlman, Anthony McGill, and Gabriela Montero are playing a rather lovely song.
The fact at the bottom of the screem reads "Barack Obama just became president; the constitution states his term begins at noon even without oath."

I'm watching history, just like millions of Americans and probably much of the world is at present, and it's a rather odd feeling. I know it is an important moment, but it is not an individual one, and so I don't know how to make much of it, except to write a bit.

Things are going to change in the next four years, I think, though I doubt it will be entirely related to having Obama in office, but rather to the the normal flow of the world, the spiral nature of nearly everything we know.

That's all.

Jul. 2nd, 2008


summer was painted on our skin and those secrets hidden in our childish lips; they'd die for a kiss

yummy dinner tonight:

lowfat vanilla yogurt+sliced banana+crunchy peanut butter+honey=protein, dairy, and carbs

conclusion reached?

i can cook when it doesn't involve a stove or oven.

May. 5th, 2008


(no subject)

only finals left.

yay for getting myself immersed in jude the obscure, a room of one's own, and the dead.

isn't that just happy?

oddly, though, i don't dislike the modern era. in fact, i quite like it, thus far. it's actually open to change...k back to studying. bye!

(edit follows)

p.s. lindsay, your post got me started on a rant i'm not sure i'm going to be able to write and pretty sure i won't finish...


Apr. 13th, 2008


(no subject)

i know it's actually the 13th now

but i just got on lj

i love you!

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